Do you sometimes feel like everyone else is in control of your life and that you have little control over your time or your relationships? It’s easy for caring, compassionate people to view setting boundaries as inappropriately selfish. Others who work hard to make good things happen easily fall into the trap of being afraid to say “no” to any potential opportunity. Sadly, when we surrender our power to choose, we learn to be helpless.
The healthier view is to understand that boundaries are a gift that you give to yourself and to others for it is the foundation for trust and mutual respect. Others will not respect you if you do not respect yourself. Where there is no respect, there can be no trust, no genuine connection. We lose our sense of personhood. We lose our energy and our passion. We lose our joy – and those around us lose the value of what we might have been for them.