Being a leader or showing leadership is hard work. Not just because there is a sense of added responsibility, but because some decisions or actions you make are not going to be popular with people who are affected by them.

I remember in my early 30’s I was put into a leadership position at the agency I worked for. I loved the idea of leading a team of people, but I didn’t have, at that time, the maturity of a leader.

Yes, I knew how to inspire people and how to create a vision to get my colleagues to rally around, but I didn’t have the ability to make some hard decisions that would leave some folks unhappy. So, I delayed those decisions until I couldn’t anymore, and I really made a mess of leading the team through those hard decisions.

You see, I was afraid of not being liked by the team.

I didn’t like doing uncomfortable things that would put me in tough situations, like firing people or correcting others’ mistakes, or cutting a budget, or making an unpopular decision that I knew the team wasn’t going to like.

But guess what? That’s what leaders must do sometimes.

I was fortunate to have a senior leadership team who believed in me, even though I messed up quite a bit in my early leadership days. I had mentors who would, over a dinner or a glass of wine, speak truth to me and give me very practical advice.

Their belief in me gave me the courage to embrace the hard and often uncomfortable parts of leadership, and not worry so much about how popular I was with my staff. I realized leadership was about being truthful to who you are, what you believe, and what you believe is best for the whole team in the long run.

Unfortunately, today Richard and I witness many non-profit leaders afraid to make tough decisions because they’re afraid of either not being liked or having to make uncomfortable decisions. Obviously, I empathize with them. The key, however, is that most of these leaders don’t have anyone speaking truth into their lives like I did.

What happens is that they waffle and wallow around decisions that need to be made and, while avoiding immediate pain, they cause a long-term problem for your entire organization.

If you’re in a leadership position or you have a vision to be in a leadership position someday, check this part of yourself. “Do I have the ability to make tough decisions even though it may be unpopular or cause momentary pain?” And, if that thought makes you cringe, ask yourself why? Over 20+ years ago I was able to ask those questions, get help dealing with the answers, and move to a place where now I see difficult and painful decisions as a gift. You can too.

Jeff