It’s here! That donor meeting you’ve been prepping for where you will be asking your donor to increase their giving significantly. This is exhilarating and a bit terrifying all at the same time!

Now, because you follow the Veritus approach, you already:

• Know the donors’ passions and interests
• Have been following up with touch points and conversations sharing how they are making a difference
• Have shared information about the new big bold project you think they might be interested in and have had discussions
• Have asked if they are open to meeting to talk about how they might support the project you have been discussing and they said yes
• Have your materials ready and have prepped the Program Director who will be joining you
• Have secured a great quiet location to meet where you won’t be disturbed

Sounds like you are ready to go! But wait. There’s something left to take care of. You. Taking time to prepare yourself is so important because how you show up and hold space during the meeting impacts everything!

What do I mean by that? Think about how we as humans mirror each other’s energy. I’m sure you’ve had an experience where someone walks in the room and you immediately feel everyone get tight and uncomfortable. And I’d bet you’ve had an experience where someone comes into the room and lights it up and creates a grounded safe space for authentic conversation. The energy that you show up with and hold throughout your donor meeting has a similar impact on how your donor feels and experiences the conversation.

And, the reality is that this is a big opportunity, which makes it easy to get nervous and go into fight or flight. This shows up differently for each of us, but can look like:

• Showing up so excited you are a bit overzealous and your energy is too ramped up
• Showing up so nervous you are tight and not your authentic self
• When the meeting or donor goes in a different direction than you expected, you might overtalk or close things out too quickly
• Not being able to present your information in a clear and motivational way

While this is all very natural, it is avoidable with proper preparation. Here’s how to get started:

Set The Stage with a Clear Vision

What do you want the donor to experience and feel when meeting with you? What would you like the conversation to feel like? As the donor reflects on your time together, what do you hope stands out to them?

Get Yourself Right

Now that you have a clear vision, what do you need to do to make that happen? You can get there by using these four steps to check in with yourself and shift your energy and state of being before and during a meeting.

1. Ask Yourself: “Where am I in my body?”

When you’re present, you are fully contained and in your body, and you can better access all the information it provides about your inner state. Ask yourself, “Where am I in my body?” and notice the area of your body that first draws your attention. You may notice your stomach, lower back, heart, neck, throat, or head. Learning to notice and tune in helps increase your emotional intelligence. It also helps you to become skilled at being fully centered in your body at every moment. Your body provides information to you about how you might be feeling.

2. Ask Yourself: “What am I feeling?”

Notice the sensations and emotions that come up as you consider this question. Some of the words that can be used to describe feelings and sensations are warmth, expansion, jittery, nervous, whirling, stabbing, scared, tight, dull, and excited.

The simple act of focusing your attention fully on the area that is “speaking” with no expectation allows the intensity to dissipate.

3. Ask Yourself: “What am I thinking?”

Once you have awareness of where your thoughts are at any given moment, you can make a conscious and intentional choice to redirect your focus and not allow them to sabotage you in certain situations.

If you are preparing for a meeting and you notice you are drawn to your stomach where you are feeling tight, dread, and your thoughts sound like, “I am going to mess this up,” or “What if they think the amount is too much and are offended?” or “What if they have question I can’t answer?” you are sending your body into fight and flight.

Take a moment to reset your thinking. Recognize that this is your ego talking. That is to say, you are making this meeting all about you! Bring your focus back to the reality that you may mess up or not know something, but your purpose and intention is to bring opportunities to your donor where they can make an impact and experience even more joy in their giving. If this isn’t the one that works, your job is to learn more about what might work. You win either way because you continue to build an authentic relationship of trust.

4. Tell Yourself: “Take a breath”

The world in which we currently live is very stimulating to the senses. Bringing your awareness inward requires intention and something to focus on. One of the simplest ways to do this is to focus on your breath. The breath is a powerful force that connects the outer world to the inner world. To follow one’s breath is to follow the flow of air from the outer world into the inner world – your body.

Each time you wish to become more present, begin by directing your focus inward with the breath and without judgement ask, “What is the quality of my breath?” Take one or two breaths and focus on how your body responds to these breaths. Are your breaths smooth, rich, and expansive, or are they hesitant, raspy, shallow, or thin? Focusing on your breath begins the journey toward being present and making choices based on being fully present.

Just taking a few minutes to check in with yourself with these four questions will bring you more into the present moment where you can more easily access resilience, presence, calm, and curiosity, which will help you show up in a way that benefits you and your donor.

The act of being with your body, feelings, thoughts, and breath allows the intensity to dissipate and you can bring in new thoughts like, “I’ve got this.”

And when you operate from a grounded place of confidence, you will be able to partner with your donor to make a transformational impact in the world.

Karen