You’re sitting across from the donor. You’ve already determined that an ask of $100,000 for the work she loves perfectly fits her capacity and inclination to give. But because she has given gifts in $5,000 increments for a total of $15,000 in one year, you’re now afraid to move to the higher amount.

Your fear of asking is caused by wrong thinking, not the reality of the situation.

There’s wrong thinking about what is happening between you and the donor. For some reason, you think the conversation and the relationship is about money. It isn’t. It’s about helping the donor achieve something that she cares about.

There’s wrong thinking about the amount. You think that making the “leap” from $15,000 to $100,000 is too big. When in reality, the donor is thinking about how much more she can DO through her giving.

Or maybe you’re thinking the donor may be offended by your actions. The donor is glad to see you and, because you have handled the relationship in the right way, i.e. as an advisor to her, helping her achieve the good she wants to do, rather than someone reaching into her purse to grab the money, she knows your motives and that you are operating in her self-interest.

Remember to get all this straight in your head before you make an ask. Things will go a lot better for the donor and for you if you do.


PS — To learn more about asking for a gift in a way that honors your donor, download our free White Paper, How to Use Permission-Based Asking With Your Donors.